1. Everyone shows up in time....on the minute or max 15 minutes late.
2. Everyone takes their shoes off when entering the house
In Finland and Sweden shoes are NOT worn inside the house.
3. Some or maybe even all guests bring something to the hosts (wine or some Nordic goodies)
This is very typical habit to honor the hosts putting the efforts in place to organize the event and get everyone together. At least in Finland the social life kind of dies a little during the long and dark winter (especially if the winter is packed with snow storms) and it is wonderful when someone invites others over and puts the efforts in to clean the house and cook even :) So, it is definitely something one wants to show appreciation for.
4. The highlight of the snack table is rye bread, cheese, caviar and Finnish chocolate ;)
When living outside Finland, and Sweden....those are the things one misses collectively. When someone has gotten their hands to the luxury goodies and then wants to share them with the rest of the group....oh joy, oh joy! It is nearly like Christmas! 😊
5. Border between Finland and Sweden vanishes
Well, except maybe during ice-hockey games :)
But otherwise I would say...who cares? I will still have my funny jokes about Finns, Swedes and Danes but I am sooo happy to have delightful Swedish girl, Ika as my friend.
I know it is in general tough for Americans to understand the relationship Finns and Swedes have with each other. But just to put it right from my view...we do not hate each other. We are more like an old married couple, but we stick together. Sweden is often times better than Finland in all statistics and that is why all the Finns like to joke about them....just like a wife would comment her husband's most recent achievement in bingo (when she had to walk out without any hits) or something similar.
6. English is spoken when one does not have a common language to make sure everyone feels involved (including the American spouses and boyfriends).
But one does steel moments for one-on-one discussions in Finnish or Swedish.
7. The positive energy in the room could heal pretty much anything
No, it is not the loud music that makes it. As the music most often either is non-existent or tuned down on the background. It is the energy coming from the group, who is simply happy!
8. Even though one has not known each others for years...one talks pretty straight and open about things
That is so deliberating. When someone asks "how are you?" or "what happened then?" the answers will not be just "oh, I am great!" or "well, it is a long story". The questions will get an honest answer, whether or not the one who asked was ready to take it. Generally among the Finnish folk saying "hello" is like the US way asking how are you, that is when you want to keep things short.
Bypassing a colleague in the office whom one knows but does not want to engage into deep discussions, one simply says "moi". From my time spent in Sweden while working, it is the same thing. One says just "hej" and moves on.
If you stop and ask the question "how are you?" be ready to take the answer, as that will not be just "I am great!"
9. Use of superlatives goes to minimum
Finns do not use superlatives often. Of course the US tv shows and pop culture has spread to Finland too. One can hear kids and teenagers use them...but I guess one uses them out at that age, so later in life one simply does not. When working here and expressing how happy one is about something, it often feels funny...as to me saying "that was really good!" is one heck of a compliment. In return I get facial expression the person expecting to get something more.
In Finland the saying is, if you get no feedback....it is positive :) Swedes are better about that but they do neither bathe in superlatives while expressing themselves.
So, when group of Finns and Swedes get together and get to speak in their native language....the word GOOD is pretty much the biggest "superlative" you will hear (I know good is not officially a superlative...but it is in Finland).
10. What one says, one means
One thing is nice about us Northeners....we say what we think but we also say only what we mean. So, when people thank one for something, they really mean it. Or stating that they "really enjoyed the party and slept in late the next morning". Those are compliments, which make my heart fly like a butterfly. Cause I know that those comments are truly meant with every word and are big compliments. One does not say "it was great seeing you, hope to see you soon again" unless one really means it. If one does not really feel those things, then we rather say in such situation... just "bye" :)
Also the expression of true appreciation is awesome, when done by Finns or Swedes. Also for the reason....it comes from the heart. Again, it may be short and sharp, but means even more.
During our September Nordic-American get together I gave a tube of Kalle's (fish caviar aka fish liver paste as my husband jokes) to a friend, who is 1/2 Finnish. He started driving back to New York the next day. He sent me a photo of the caviar tube...he had kept in cooler with bunch of ice, like it was a transplant. Just few days ago, some weeks after the party, I got the photo of nearly empty tube with the comment "We need IKEA in here ".
The tube as such is not more than few dollars but one cannot get it where he lives now. It warmed my heart that while I am so keen to share what I have with those, who I consider as my friends, that they also know to appreciate that and show it back.
11. The bond is strong
The Nordic group, which I now happily belong to...is Awesome! We are mixed bunch with different backgrounds, different ages and phase in life. But you know what....nobody cares or pays attention to that. Cause we are a team, we were a team the moment we met each other. Just because we are sharing the connection to Finland and Sweden, and our boyfriends & spouses do too.
Within this group it will never matter what age one is, what one does for work...in this group somehow the automatic gear kicks in - come as you are and you will fit right in!
And this on top of the friends and family one has back in Finland and Sweden, and our dear friends and family here in US, in my New home ;)
11. The bond is strong
The Nordic group, which I now happily belong to...is Awesome! We are mixed bunch with different backgrounds, different ages and phase in life. But you know what....nobody cares or pays attention to that. Cause we are a team, we were a team the moment we met each other. Just because we are sharing the connection to Finland and Sweden, and our boyfriends & spouses do too.
Within this group it will never matter what age one is, what one does for work...in this group somehow the automatic gear kicks in - come as you are and you will fit right in!
And this on top of the friends and family one has back in Finland and Sweden, and our dear friends and family here in US, in my New home ;)
